Escape from Abusive Fans!
by Ghostly Hamburger
Summary: Rabid fangirls, like me, all luff Danneh and some of the other characters. But what do the characters think of us? Read and find out! New chapter finally! Trevor is interviewed.
1. Danny!

This fic is brought to you by sugar! It's good for your colon!

This fic is also brought to you by ZAGRH8R, who told me to put it up here. So there's a small reference to her fic in there, if anyone can see it.

I don't own Danneh. But I do own the Random Announcer/Host Person!

* * *

Random Announcer/Host Person (Whom from now on will be called RAHP 'cause I'm lazy): Welcome to Escape From Abusive Fans! This is our first episode, or technically a remake of our first episode, because Steph didn't save the original.

Steph: I was lazy. So sue me.

RAHP: I plan to. Anyways, to start the show, our guest is Danny Fenton!

Danny: Why am I here?

RAHP: We're here to discuss what abuse you've suffered from your fans. More specifically, your obsessed fangirls.

Danny: Well, lots of people make me do...odd things to strange girls. A lot of those...things are sort of scary for me. I'm only 14!

RAHP: I see. What else have they done?

Danny: They've made me do those same things with Dash, Tucker, and one person even made me do some of those things with Vlad! However, some people make me do those things with Sam, and I don't really mind that as much.

RAHP: Well, since this show is very short, we'll end it here. Now, we shall release all your fangirls.

Danny: Um...OK...

Fangirls: WE LOVE YOU DANNY!

RAHP: I suggest you run.


	2. Tucker!

Welcome back to Escape From Abusive Fans! I am currently here to do the disclaimer thingy. I don't wanna, but I hafta.

I don't own Danny Phantom. That belongs to Butch Hartman. Some of Tucker's lines and whole distaste for gays belongs to ZAGRH8R, who I don't think I asked permission from originally, but has kindly let me use the lines anyways.

Part 2!

* * *

RAHP: Welcome back to our show! Steph's stopped being lazy, and decided to write another one of these! Nah, she's still lazy. She's just got sugar.

Steph: I created you, and I can take you out like that.

RAHP: Pfft. Yeah right. The fans love me too much. Anyways, to start the show, our guest this week is Tucker Foley!

Audience: crickets chirping

RAHP: Cheer or die.

Audience: WOOHOOWOO!

RAHP: Much better. Tucker, come on out!

Tucker: Wasn't I already on this show?

RAHP: That copy was deleted. So we need to redo this.

Tucker: Why was it deleted?

RAHP: Steph's lazy.

Steph: I'm warning you....just start the show already....

RAHP: Fine. Tucker, what abuse have you suffered from your fangirls?

Tucker: I have fangirls?

RAHP: Let me rephrase the question. What abuse have you suffered from _Danny's _fangirls?

Tucker: Well....they seem to think I'll never get a date with anyone.

RAHP: You won't.

Tucker: Doesn't Valerie count? Even though she was using me?

RAHP: No.

Tucker: Oh well. Also, some fans seem to want to pair me with Sam. That's not right, Sam and Danny are so going to get together.

RAHP: Is that so?

Steph: -whap- Was FTF not obvious enough?

RAHP: Alright, moving on. What else have you suffered?

Tucker: Well...some people seem to think I'd make a good boyfriend for Danny. That's just plain sick and wrong.

RAHP: So...you have to deal with slash?

Tucker: Yeah. To quote one of the many stories about Danny, "HOMOSEXUALITY...EQUALS BAD!" and "HOMSEXUALITY! UNCLEAN!"

RAHP: So I see you don't like gays.

Tucker: No. Wait...are you one?

RAHP: I'm a random person. So far, I'm genderless.

Tucker: So...you're bi?

RAHP: Well...you could put it that way...

Tucker: EVIL! –runs far, far, away-

RAHP: Yeah. We were supposed to release your fangirls, but this show is too long anyways, and you suck. Until next time, loyal (I hope) fans!

* * *

Only two reviewers so far. You guys rock!

Chibi Millenia Phantom: Danny likes being hyper! And cookies are what powers me to write this, so thanks!

Divagurl277: This is the first time I've actually had to write a second chapter for you, instead of it being prewritten! I'm going to a lot of work for you. Appreciate it!


	3. Sam!

I've got sugar, so I've decided to write another one of these. Hope ya like!

I don't own DP. But I do own the RAHP. And myself.

* * *

RAHP: Today, for a change, we interview a female. Samantha Manson!

Sam: Call me 'Samantha' again and die.

RAHP: Fine, _Sam _Manson.

Sam: Better.

RAHP: Anyways, what abuse have you suffered from your fans?

Sam: Well, most people seem to think I'm going to be Danny's girlfriend some day...andIhopethey'reright.

RAHP: So, you like Danny?

Sam: Yes...if you tell anyone, I'll kill you.

RAHP: I don't have to tell anyone. This show is airing live.

Sam: Oh crap.

RAHP: To continue, has there been any more abuse?

Sam: Some people seem to prefer me with Tucker, and that's just odd. I'm a vegetarian...and he'd eat meat even if it spoke a foreign language.

RAHP: Very interesting. Continue.

Sam: One person once paired me with _Dash._ That's just plain wrong. I kissed him only once, and there was a good reason behind that!

RAHP: Riiiiight....

Sam: And one person wrote a story portraying me as gay. I have nothing against lesbians, but I'm not one. I like guys.

RAHP: Especially Danny?

Sam: Ye-shut up.

RAHP: All right. Now, since Sam hates me and the show is supposed to be very short, we shall release Sam's fans.

Sam: They won't attack me, will they?

RAHP: Just you? No. However, we're also releasing Danny.

Sam: Huh?

Fans: SAM! DANNY! YOU SOOO BELONG TOGETHER!!!!

RAHP: And that's our show. Until next time, when we interview....we haven't decided who to interview yet. Should we interview Trevor, Vlad, or Jack? You decide...and Steph'll write whatever you choose!

Steph: Stop talking about me like I'm your servant or something.

RAHP: But you will write whatever they choose, right?

Steph: Well, yeah....

RAHP: So until next time!

* * *

DaddysLilDfekt13: I don't think I'll get tired of hearing that, considering the kids at my school think I can't tell a joke to save my life.

SawCyn-wroteSin: Sam thanks you. She's currently using the hammer to ward off D/S shippers.

Divagurl277: Technically, these reviews are pushing me to rewrite, but whatever. Reviews are good.

Shalei: Glad you like it.

ZAGRH8R: Well, here's Sam's interview. And why'd you say Jack twice? And thanks for the permission to reference your fics-in fact, I did in this chapter. The one with you is coming fairly soon.

Jazzeh: The gay thing was in the last Tucker one, just not as strongly as in the rewrite. And good thing for you, the Trevor one is one of the ones I remember the best.

Kuurah: Tucker the homophobe....now that we've established that, he's gonna end up gay.

PurpleGhostSausage: Cookie!

Chibi Millenia Phantom: YAY...um...YAY!

Blossomng Orange Rose: Hyper is good. And bi has many different meanings.

PT-chan: I can see Tucker as a homophobe. But I also see Dash as gay. And Danny and Sam as the perfect couple. Me personally, I have nothing against homo or bisexuals. But really, that topic won't even be discussed on DP. It is Nickelodeon!

Queen of Cats: Danny/Sam now! Danny/Sam forever!


	4. Vlad!

It's Vlad! Yes. This, by popular demand, interviews Vlad.

* * *

RAHP: Hello and welcome back to the show! Today we interview Vlad! And he's not here yet.

Steph: I had nothing to do with that!

RAHP: I wasn't accusing you....but what did you do with him?

Steph: I just didn't want him to hurt Danny....

RAHP: Steph. Danny isn't here. Now bring out the guest.

Steph: Okay!

RAHP: I really hate that girl....

Steph: Here he is!

Vlad: Someday I'll get you for that.

RAHP: What did she do to you?

Vlad: Locked me in a small closet full of sugar.

RAHP: You didn't eat any of the sugar, did you?

Vlad: Er, no...

RAHP: Good. The hosts are hyper enough, we don't need hyper guests as well.

Vlad: Why am I here anyways?

RAHP: You've got fans. They want you here.

Vlad: All right. Just get this over with.

RAHP: Okay. Now, have you suffered any abuse from fans?

Vlad: Yes. Everyone portrays me as a villain.

RAHP: ....you are a villain.

Vlad: No I'm not. I'm just misunderstood, thanks to that TV show.

RAHP: Many think you're just crazy.

Vlad: I'm not.

RAHP: Moving on. Has your crush on Maddie affected the abuse fans give you?

Vlad: Yes. Nobody seems to like the idea of me being with her. Except one....but she also forced Danny to like me. That sort of scared me.

RAHP: That'd scare anyone. Now, since the show is always very short, and we wasted a bunch of time getting you here, it's time to release the fangirls. Which oddly enough you have.

Vlad: Fangirls?

RAHP: Yeah. Girls think you're sexy for an old guy.

Vlad Fangirls: WE LOVE YOU!!!!!

* * *

Thanks to all reviewers!

Queen of Cats: Sadly, since not many said Jack, he should be coming in about....2 or 3 more chapters.

Blossoming Orange Rose: Trevor may come next.

ZAGRH8R: I'm debating whether to have Trevor or you interviewed next.

SawCyn-wroteSin: But some people actually love Vlad! I fail to see how, but they do. And sorry, no battle.

Ella-629: Yay D/S!

Divagurl277: I shall.

DaydreamingTurtle: Sorry, but no Jack.

Albinoghostgirl04: No fights in EFAF, sorry.

Chibi Millenia Phantom: You want Vlad, you get Vlad.

YAY!!: Trevor's the Hornet Kid from MBK.


	5. Trevor!

It's a new chapter, finally!

And it's no longer in script form, thanks to the new rules that do not allow script form…which is the reason HPT is no longer here….

Anyways. Read it!

* * *

Lights flash, music plays, and suddenly, there is a stage. Yes, the scene is being set for the first time, so the readers here won't see just dialogue-because for all we know, this could've been a radio show. But it isn't! It's just this randomly-written thing. Anyways, the host, so fondly named the 'Random Announcer slash Host Person', also known as the 'RAHP', now enters onto the stage, and the crowd (imported from Korea) goes wild. Because we told them to.

The RAHP speaks. "Welcome back to the show! Steph may seem as if she's not lazy for writing this chapter, but in reality, she is lazy, because she's simply changing what she wrote weeks ago into a not script form!"

Ahem. That is actually hard to do. "Riiiiight."

The RAHP turns towards the audience. It (we've never figured out its gender) says, "Our guest today is Trevor."

A boy walks onto the stage. He looks bewildered, as if he doesn't know where he is. So he just says, "Um…hi?"

The RAHP replies, "Hello, Trevor. We unfortunately can't talk about the abuse you've suffered from your fans, because you barely have any. In fact, you only have one."

A girl, seeming to be only a bit younger than Trevor, runs onto the stage, apparently hyper. "Hi!" she says excitedly.

Taking one look at the girl, Trevor says, "Oh no...I remember you…"

"Yes, she was here when this show was first made, remember?" the RAHP reminds him.

"TREVOR!" the girl (who I'm informing you now is named Jazzeh) screams, embracing him in a giant bear hug.

Trevor, now scared of her, yells, "Get her off me!"

"NEVER!" Jazzeh says loudly, laughing maniacally.

"One fangirl isn't that bad," the RAHP reminds. "Just ask Danny, who's still being attacked by his fangirls." Offstage, you hear a few faint cries, sounding like the words, "Help!" and "Danny! We love you!"

"I like having fans…" Trevor says slowly, "But this is crazy!"

Smiling somewhat evilly, the RAHP says, "Well, we'll leave you alone now."

Jazzeh cheers, but Trevor cries, "No! Don't leave me with her!"

"Too bad," the RAHP says, laughing.

Jazzeh grins. "I'm not _that_ evil…" she says slowly. 

To end the show, the RAHP says, "So, until next time, when we interview someone else!"

As the camera fades out and more music begins to play, signifying the end, you can hear a voice call out weakly, "Help me…"

And then you can hear Jazzeh still laughing.

* * *

Thanks so much to all the reviewers. You all rock more than ever! 

Chibi Millenia Phantom: I am doing Trevor.

WolfGirlSammie: Chocolate milkshakes are good.

Fanficobsessor: Sugar inspires me…actually, the whole idea for this story came from a comic I saw on Deviantart.

JadeRabbyt: Well, hope this chapter is still funny.

Aura Spectre: -poke- You didn't _really _die laughing, did you?

Queen of Cats: Ember! I must remember to interview her.


End file.
